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The Essentials for Adoption Attuned Parenting

The Essentials for Adoption Attuned Parenting explores how parents can best relate and connect to their adopted child. Join GIFT coaches to discover tips and tools using Adoption Attuned Parenting and build a strong foundation for your adoptive family.
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The Essentials for Adoption Attuned Parenting
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Feb 24, 2021

Adoptive parents and GIFT Family Services' adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David are joined by special guest, UK adoption coach and adoptee, Simon Benn. His work with children focuses on showing parents how to help their children be happy, build their children's confidence and strengthen their resilience. In this episode we learn his "story" that led to his work empowering adoptees and adopters to break through to T.H.R.I.V.E., an acronym described by Trauma release - overcoming adoption trauma, Healing - repairing emotional wounds, Resilience - bouncing back from setbacks, Identity - learning who you really are, Vision - mapping out your future, and Enjoyment - loving your life. 

This is the 1st part of a 2-part interview with Coach Simon. Part 1  reveals how his past informed his present work. In Part 2, he shares his T.H.R.I.V.E. model and how it can help other adoptees to breakthrough to happiness.    

     

Jan 23, 2021

Join adoptive coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David as  they discuss the importance of "giving voice" to adopted children. They talk about how adoptees' voices are sometimes minimized and offer suggestions on how to adoptive parents can be better listeners.    

Dec 15, 2020

Adoptive parents, adoption coaches and long time hosts of The Essentials for Adoption Attuned Parenting, Joann DiStefano and Susan David are joined by colleague, Sally Ankerfelt to discuss GIFT's upcoming Subscription Series by the same name. Sally and Susan highlight the first course in the series, Getting It Together Before You Adopt, designed for those who are just beginning to think about the adoption option.     

Oct 21, 2020

Join adoption coaches and adoptive parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, as they discuss the importance of connection for our adopted children during this difficult COVID 19 era. Listen to a few ideas they share about how to connect. They encourage parents to be Adoption-attuned as they intentionally create rapport and connection with their children, yet following their children's lead as to what works best for them. 

Sep 30, 2020

Join hosts adoption coaches and adoptive parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, for a discussion on the importance of handling the disappointments of infertility or the burden of financing an adoption early rather than later so that pain and resentment does not get in the way of  building a solid relationship with  your adopted child.

Sep 3, 2020

Join hosts, adoption coaches and adoptive parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, for a discussion about a less explored but very important aspect of Adoption-attunement (AQ), follows ethical practices. 

Jul 29, 2020

Join adoption coaches and parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David as they  host the fourth and final episode of  a series dedicated to adoption-attuned parenting and the quest for racial equity.  They'll be joined once again by colleagues, Gayle Swift and Sally Ankerfelt, for an interview with special guest, adoption coach and adoptee, Sharon Obazee. Ms. Obazee brings her unique perspective and shares her thoughts on transracial adoption and how we can make a difference in our actions, words, families & communities with a lens particulalrly focused on the intersection of race and adoption.

 

 

Jul 21, 2020

Adoption coaches and parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David host the third in a four part series of special editions of Essentials for Adoption-attuned Parenting.  They'll be joined once again by colleagues, Gayle Swift and Sally Ankerfelt, for an interview with  special guest Lola Adebara, Founder and Executive Director of Minneapolis based Partnerships for Permanence. Ms. Adebara has a wide variety of social work experience and she'll share how how we can assist adopted and foster young adults to not only to dream big but  develop the tools needed for their success. 

Jun 30, 2020

Adoption coaches and parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David host the second in a four part series of special editions of Essentials for Adoption-attuned Parenting.  Joined by their colleagues, Gayle Swift and Sally Ankerfelt, they discuss recent events in our country calling for racial justice and how that relates to adopted children of color. They'll share a coaches' perspective on what adoptive families can do to best attune to their adopted children of color 

Jun 24, 2020

Adoption coaches and parents, Joann DiStefano and Susan David  host a special edition of Essentials for Adoption-attuned Parenting.  Joined by their colleagues, Gayle Swift and Sally Ankerfelt, they discuss  recent events in our country calling for racial justice and how that relates to adopted children of color. They share some of the things they could have done better or differently as adoptive parents including believing in the false promise of color blindness. 

Jun 19, 2020

Join your hosts, adoptive parents and adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David as they discuss listening to understand your adoptive children rather than to refute, solve, or soothe their concerns or problems. Allowing our children to speak truth aloud is part of Intentional Parenting and Adoption-attunement (AQ) practices that can help us build a more loving and trusting relationship with our children. 

May 18, 2020

Join your hosts, adoptive parents and adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David for a discussion on how Intentional Parenting and Adoption-attunement (AQ) practices can help adoptive parents and their children stay or get regulated, build resiliency, and triumph over the challenge of the post-COVID-19 world. 

Apr 15, 2020

This month's The Essentials of Adoption-attunement Parenting touches base with adoptive parents who need to be aware that trauma and attachment issues will persist despite the whole world having stopped. It continues to be important to tune in with yourself first before you can offer help to your children. Take care of making them feel safe, nurture their needs, and then create a sense of belonging. 

Mar 2, 2020

Abandonment is part of adoption. Rejection is the belief that emerges from it. Adoptive families must learn to accept their children for who they are and at the same time, recognize that their presence in their family comes at high personal cost to them. While we have hopes and dreams for them, we have to make space for their attributes, talents, and temperament and not project our desires onto them. Adoption-attunement (AQ) allows us to take our children's insights to heart and reconnect to the idea that they are loved for who they are and awesome in their own right.      

Feb 10, 2020

GIFT adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss the myths that have pervaded adoption for decades. These myths are detrimental to the development of our adopted children. This short discussion emphasizes why we, as adoptive parents, need to find the courage to challenge these myths in our everyday life.     

Jan 10, 2020

GIFT adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss how the concepts of inducement, intentionality, and commitment work with Adoption-attuned parenting.     

Dec 4, 2019

GIFT adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss why intentional parenting is a must for adoptive parents and share some examples of what you can do to better attune with your adopted child.  

Nov 8, 2019

GIFT adoption coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss the importance of adoptive parent's loving the child they have and not the child of their fantasies. Adoptive families can sharpen their adoption-attunement quotient or AQ by listening to this episode.  

 

Aug 2, 2018

GIFT coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss possible causes of anxiety in adoptive parents and how this might create anxiety in their children. Learn ways to understand and support them using Adoption-attuned* practices. Some of the information is based on Privilege of Parenting by Bruce Dolin, Psy. D.   

Jun 19, 2018

GIFT coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss possible causes of anxiety in adopted children and ways to understand and support them using Adoption-attuned* practices. Some of the  information is based on Privilege of Parenting by Bruce Dolin, Psy. D.   

May 24, 2018

GIFT Coaches, Joann DiStefano and Susan David, discuss why it's important to understand how perceptions of reality differ among members in adoptive families. Of course, it is important to be Adoption-attuned* and also to update how you perceive your children; appreciate their various aspects and shift your patterns and ways of being when appropriate.         

Jan 16, 2018

Hosts and coaches, Joann and Susan, discuss the challenges that adoptive families may have faced in the past year. Using Adoption-attuned Parenting (AAQ) and "Well Formed Outcomes", you can shape and improve your families' relationships in 2018. Practicing intentionality and mindfulness allows for easier repairs of tensions and conflicts within your adoptive family.      

Dec 19, 2017

Adoption Coach, Sally Ankerfelt, hosts this enlightening interview with two young adult professionals who have experienced the foster/adoption care system firsthand and are now working to improve it for others with their organization, Partnerships for Permanence (P4P). P4P is an affiliate of GIFT Family Services and is a resource for families, children and young adults. You can find P4P at GiftFamilyServices.com.          

Aug 8, 2017

In Episode 10, we focus on relationship building during the middle years, ages 7 through 12.  Through the lens of Adoption-attuned* parenting and the coaching presupposition, "every behavior has a meaning", we consider some of the challenges that may arise during these childhood years. Learn how to create a supportive space in these conscious-developing years that assists in openness and acceptance.

Jun 1, 2017

In Episode 9, we will continue our discussion relating to differences that adoptive families face before, during, and after the adoption process.  Today, our focus is centered on the adoption experience after the process in years 0 to 7, using Adoption-attuned* principles and the coaching presupposition, "the map is not the territory."  We will consider some of the challenges that may arise during your child's earliest years.   

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